He is buried about where he was there in that picture. I have no idea how i'm going to get over it. As I type this it feels like my throat is just closing up. I have work at 5pm and maybe it will get my mind off it, so maybe I should go in. I'm 22, lucky was 19... hes always been around and it feels like no dog can EVER replace him.
When I seen him as we burid him just a few hours ago, he was cold, lifeless and hard. At first it was comforting that we brought him home and buried him, I felt a bit better. But now I feel sad again.
I know the proceedure would have been quick, but what if we gave him just another few more days. I don't know, maybe its being selfish, but in a lot of ways he seemed so alive and looked like he had many more weeks or months left in him.
This makes me so much more angry about death. Why the hell do people accept it?
Now i'm left with a few photographs, my memories, a video tape and thats is. With each day I feel my memory of him will fade.
Maybe in time I will get another dog and love it just as much.
5 comments:
Oh Matt, Of course you're going to grieve. This beautiful dog has accompanied you almost all your life. Take the time for it, let it happen. Your feelings are real and true. There's nothing belittling about it. Dogs (pets) play a major roll in our lives. They are there for us, they give us comfort and we give them love, affection and care back.
And yes, perhaps down the road..as a testament to how wonderful a relationship you were capable of having with your dog..you will have another to love as much, and he/she will accompany you through another part of your life.
Take care,
I wish there was more to say.
D
Matt,
I feel so sad for you. Losing a pet is hard, but losing a pet you've known and loved your entire life is devastating. Don't think for a second that you shouldn't be grieving this loss. It doesn't matter that Lucky was a dog and not a human. He was your friend and you loved him and now he's gone. You have every right to cry about it.
Please don't keep torturing yourself about whether the timing was right to let Lucky go. By what you've written, it sounds like he was suffering there at the end. Death is horrible but suffering can be much worse. To let him go - even though it hurt you terribly to do so - was no doubt the kindest thing you could have done for your friend.
Take care,
Robin
Matt,
get hold of a copy of James Herriot's Dog Stories book .. read about how he grieved over the loss of his dogs, and how he recuperated.
Not great literature, but would likely raise at least a wry smile.
artifex
When my cat Goble died, I grieved for several months before I was able to even be somewhat reasonable about my loss. And I'd only had him for 7 years. Now, 5 years later, I still cry occasionally when I think about him or something triggers my memories of him.
In some ways, I think we can love pets even more than we can love humans. Humans yell, argue, etc, but pets are just always supportive. They give and give.
Don't rush into getting a new dog. I got 3 cats about 2 months after my Goble died and it just wasn't the same. I wasn't ready to care enough yet. Although I love those new cats, they can never replace my One True Cat.
Hi Matt
Sorry about the loss of your dog. Pets become members of the family, so you miss them when they're gone.
When I was in my teens, we were not financially able to pay for treatment of a basset hound we had. The previous dog was also sickly, but a kennel took it back and a new owner was able to take care of it. So our basset hound was put to sleep. It caused us so much sadness that we were not able to have another dog after that.
Cheers
Arturo
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